Shedeur Sanders' Draft Stock in Jeopardy After Insisting on Playing Settlers of Catan During NFL Interviews

The 22 year old signal caller’s draft stock has reportedly plummeted this past week after multiple NFL insiders revealed he spent his team interviews aggressively insisting on playing Settlers of Catan with NFL teams instead of answering questions about his football career.

Sources close to the Combine say Sanders arrived at each NFL team meeting with a well worn Settlers game box, a bag of custom gold plated resource cards, and an unshakable belief that bartering brick for ore is the purest test of leadership.

"You want to see how I handle pressure?" Sanders allegedly told a stunned New York Giants scout. "Watch me construct a network of roads, settlements, and cities with sheer brick n wood dominance while you’re hoarding ore and settling for development cards like a coward."

Reports indicate Sanders was "arrogant and inflexible" during meetings, showing up in a backward hat and refusing to discuss football strategy. Instead, he pulled out a Settler of Catan box, laid out the board, and informed executives they could "All play cuz I got the expansion pack, and you can pick any color except red… 'cuz that’s Shedeur’s color, and this is my game.'"

"The arrogance was staggering," said one anonymous scout. "We asked what kind of teammate he was, and he responded by trying to negotiate a two to one sheep-for-wheat deal while accusing our assistant GM of ‘tanking the economy and holding the board back.’"

Some analysts see it as a power move… a calculated flex against the league’s corporate, buttoned up culture.

"He’s asserting dominance," one nervous scout admitted, shuffling a stack of 12 resource cards hoping a 7 wasn’t rolled. "He’s showing us he’s not afraid to backstab allies mid game if it means securing those last two victory points. But I’m still not sure how that translates to reading a Cover 2 defense."

One AFC GM, visibly exasperated, vented his frustrations. "Look, I get it… he’s a gamer. But when I asked about his footwork under pressure, he just slid me a sheep and said, ‘Let’s discuss how I can help you expand your settlements.’ I don’t even know what that means."

Sanders’ draft stock, once considered a lock for the top five, is now in freefall after growing frustrated with NFL teams that had never played before during their meeting.

Analysts point to a particularly disastrous interview with the Las Vegas Raiders, where Sanders reportedly spent 20 minutes arguing that his "brick for wheat" trade offer was "more than fair" before storming out, accusing the team of "not understanding market value."

Witnesses claim he left behind a game board and a cryptic note reading, "Call me when you’re serious about connecting your cities with roads."

Drew Forbes

Drew was raised by his 3 dads on an Emu farm in Humboldt, Iowa. He has an irrational fear of cockroaches, and seafood restaurants that leave some of the skin on the fish they serve. In August, 2019 Drew blacked out drinking bourbon Manhattans, and when he woke up the next morning this website had been created. Drew doesn’t have a beard, but if he decided to grow one it would easily become the most interesting thing about him. When he grows up some day, he wants to die.

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